The Voices in My Heart

How many times have u read those comparisons done with star signs, birthdays,months,years, initials whatever to gauge a person’s character and stuff?

And how many times have u went…
1) Oh my god! this is sooooo me!!! and
2) Oh crap! I ain’t like that!

Actually i came here to trash about gossips… but then, i stumbled upon a bulletin that gauges a person’s characters with their birth month… thanks to the person who posted it, i have something else to trash.

now, let’s see how this works on me… the post is the ones in bold. my answers are in brackets below them… Had to use this method coz my color link is not working. bloody hell…

————AUGUST—————
(that’s my birth month, in case u still haven’t get it)

Outgoing personality.
(err… maybe. I’ll give it for this one)

Takes risks.
("Risks" is used very liberally… so ok)

Feeds on attention.
(Like duh! I thrive on attention. Remember, the NEED to be different)

No self-control.
(HELLO!!!! where did u get that idea from! i control myself like how I control the people around me!)

Kind-hearted.
(ha ha… ya ritE! if kind-hearted means picking on my sister and everyone else just for entertainment…)

Self-confident.
(If there’s no confidence, there’s no me. I even feel confident about failing when i know it.)

Loud and boisterous.
(not many people know this side of me, i’m only like that to 4 other people, who make up my immediate family. oh come on! I ain’t loud! or boisterous…)

VERY revengeful.
(oh come on! this is the LAST thing anyone would say about me! EVERYTHING is sweeter than revenge. i hate taking revenges, wasting my energy on someone i diss… what the heck…)

Easy to get along with and talk to.
(Erm, i thought i give off this "air" that says "stay away, I’m stuck up"? right? that’s what i still think…)

Has an "everything’s peachy" attitude.
(I hate peaches and anything peachy… so this might JUST be true. considering the fact that i hate peaches. so if everything’s peachy and i hate peaches… do u even get what i’m tryna say?!)

Likes talking
(this i can’t deny… born to talk. BUT!! i only talk too much to people I’m well acquainted with. I’m sorry if i’m rude to you. It’s probably becoz ur talking to me for the very 1st time… I make very bad 1st impressions; coz i don’t make the 1st move, and I’ll definitely give you a raised eyebrow if I don’t know you and you start talking to me all of a sudden)

Likes singing.
(I can’t deny. Even if i sound like a crow, i still do it.)

Loves music.
(Who doesn’t? this is a much-too-general statement)

Daydreamer.
( If daydreaming means peaches… then yeah. if ur smart, u’ll understand what I’m saying…If not, ur just dumb)

Easily distracted.
(I won’t agree… would u?)

Hates not being trusted.
( I hate not being trusted… bUt i don’t expect people to trust me either. Coz i don’t trust anyone easily. I think I’m trustworthy… but it’s really up to u what you wanna do… no pressure)

BIG imagination.
(What’s the difference between daydreaming and "big imagination"? I DON’T day dream, nor do I have big imaginations!)

Loves to be loved.
(Of course… but only if i love u as much. it stinks when someone you don’t love, loves you… and when someone you love a lot, doesn’t love you. eRgh…)

Hates studying.
(Erm, r u just stating a fact or saying that I’m just a stupid lethargic slab of meat? i don’t love it… i don’t hate it either…)

In need of "that someone".
(HA HA! this is the worst statement in this whole chunk of words! Wad the hell! do i look like i need "that someone"?!)

Longs for freedom.
(Nope… i find my own freedom, even when I’m trapped in a bird cage)

Rebellious when withheld or restricted.
(I’m rebellious even when I’m not withheld or restricted…)

Lives by "no pain no gain"
(neh, utterly untrue… I’m the kind who always try to find a way to gain with least pain…)

Caring.
(am i? probably… but i don’t think it’s THAT obvious for someone to state it JUST like THAT…)

Always a suspect.
(YEAH! what’s wrong with you people! why do u look at me even when i didn’t hide ur stuff?!! Look for ur stuff instead of giving me that "I know you took it" look!)

Playful.
(define playful……….)

Mysterious.
( haha… maybe to the eyes of people who don’t really know me as me…)

"Charming" or "beautiful" to everyone.
(I know i’m the most charming and beautiful person i’ve EVER came across… i don’t know about everyone. oh, wait a minute… i notice the ""s… what are you REALLY tryna say?)

Stubborn.
(That’s my 2nd name)

Curious.
(probably… hmm…)

Independent.
(ok, i know it may not seem like it… but yeah… i am kinda independent; though i still live with my parents (coz i can’t possibly live in my own apartment in Singapore) and get allowances from my parents and they pay my bills…)

Strong willed.
(i’ll say yes VERY loosely)

A fighter.
(I’m highly opinionated… but i don’t think I’m a fighter.. it sounds weird… fighter? haha…. now, it sounds funny…)

Repost in 5 mins and you will meet the love of your life sometime next month.
(what a stupid "chain letter" statement. whatever happened to " the guy you have a crush on would call u exactly at 11.32pm tomorrow" or "you will have a bad love life for 7 years". these stuff gets on my nerves. Yeah, i’m a nervy person too)

Assuming that you already know that I’m full of myself as i’ve mentioned that a hella loada times before, i’ll go on to say that…. this assessment of my character with my birth month was only 54.5% right. the rest were all utter bull. at least i think so. if you beg to differ… it ain’t my problem. come beg.

with these, i think i’m gonna go back to hibernation from the blog…

Buzzing off…

faNa~

See, many people asked me why is it twenty two and not nineteen, or eight or whatever… in fact, i have no idea why it’s 22. so stop bugging me.

Anyway, i think i’ve finally found a way to be different from all the scarved girls out there. My scarves are gonna have the words twenty two on ‘em.

Those of you who got a sneak preview, ur lucky. now i’m just trying to get hold of different colors of fabric paint to get it on all my scarves. so if you see anyone else with those kinda wordings on their scarves, just remember, i don’t copy from people, they copy from me…

whao.. this is a very short entry…

Buzzing off…
faNa~

I read marziya’s blog… and felt the urge to write about it here… here’s a link to her blog… http://eatmychickenbreast.blogs.friendster.com/duntouchmychickenbreast/2006/03/is_science_tryi.html#comments

It is also stated in the Qur’an that mountains are pegs of earth; and this fact is proven by geographical science. If we do not have mountains, each layer on earth will spin on its own at different paces. We’ll be on land and we can see the sky spinning, the seas whirling, all of us would end up being in a vortex.

Why not put both God’s words and science together? Of course for those who believe, God made everything. And to some extent, we all know that a second for God might be a few or more Yonkers to us. So God did make Adam and eve, and that’s called evolution from a single celled organism to a multi cellular being. How about taking it this way?

What about thinking that got made the sun for the day and them on for the night…. By making earth spin around the sun and the moon around the earth. Isn’t that how it really is?

Yes, with advances in genetic engineering, we are now able to detect genetic disorders in the future progeny. To ya’ll believers of God, did God not make us smart too? So that we’ll venture out to find answers for everything in and around us? Does He not know that these stuff will happen way before they actually happen?

For many centuries people have been trying to prove that God doesn’t exist by finding a reason for every single thing that happens. They have rummaged through bibles and The Qur’an to prove stuff wrong, but in fact, by doing that, they have found that those words in those books are real. And they can never be told by a human who have never seen those.

Take for instance, the 1^st example I made, mountains as pegs:
all muslims, or in fact most muslims know that the qur’an was reveled in the middle east, in a desert where there are no mountains, but shifting dunes. But the fact that mountains are pegs of earth was reveled there. Did The Prophet (PBUH) know that these mountains functioned that way, even when he has never seen one of those?

The whole prospect of how Man is trying to play God has been debated upon for decades. But Man will still be Man and our curiosity never ceases. Of course there’s a limit of what we can do. Whatever Man is trying to do, is to keep Himself alive in this earth. Survival of the fittest. Whatever it is, for those who believe, it’s all in God’s hands, and for those who don’t, there’s always a reason to why those happen…

I Saw this tiny letter in one of my Never-used-for-any-work-purposes planners; and this letter was written on the page with the date August 2, 2004 - Monday:

Life is full of shit, we just got  to deal with it.
My problems in life might seem micro compared to billions of other problems; but nevertheless, they are still problems
Sometimes, solutions are just in front of you, but that’s when God makes you blind.
I love my life as it is and I’m grateful tthat I am Spared with these but still….
Problems are still problems…

God made me smart, but made others smarter.
God made me witty, but gave me temper.
God made me beautiful, but made me fat. (<– What was THAT about?!)
God gave me a perfect family… Indeed he did… and He took it back.
Yes, Man is never satisfied, that’s what God made us  to be…
All I’m asking is for someone who’d listen and be there for me.

If you never see me ever again, don’t worry… I’ll be in God’s hands.
And to everyone out there, Suicide doesn’t solve your problems.
In fact, it makes them bigger.
And if you are too afraid to life and decide to die,
Are you not afraid of God whom you’re gonna meet as you say goodbye?

I ain’t got no idea what i was thinking when i wrote this… but i guess it’s worth the sharing and attention..
After all, it’s my work… MY work… MY!
I think you got it….

buzzing off…
faNa~

God… you know how sad is it to do what i just did?

I just changed my blog skin and it hurts deep inside…

But I had to do it… you know why?

So many people with a blog in their friendster account has the same black and red background.

I was not bothered by it before, but now…

I can’t stand it.. too many people too many people!!!

So i decided to change it to a 2nd best one

But when i looked at the available designs…

There wasn’t a 2nd best

There was worse… worser, worsest, worserest… oh Gosh!

But I still gotta do it. Oh man! What kinda trauma am I putting myself into!

Don’t ask me why I ain’t opening a blog in blogspot or something…

In fact, I did… but I abandoned it

I was too lazy to design it.

For those who can’t read some lines in my previous entries because of the font color…

I’m sorry, I am not deciding to change it… not any time soon, not ever

Why am I doing all these?

bottomline: The need to be different even with minimal choices…

peace out!

Buzzing off…

faNa~

I don’t know what’s with me and my last papers… i always leave early… early as in 45 minutes into the paper early…
Sem 1: last paper was micro A… i left early
Sem 2: It was my Cell Bio paper…
Sem 3: can’t remember i think it was ABC
Sem 4: Medical Micro

Ok, nevermind about that. Right after the paper, the girls and I headed to town to catch FD 3. Now here’s the thAng i wanna talk about…

Final Destination
The 1st time i watched final destination, was with my father and sisters. We stumbled upon the movie without knowing i was this gory thriller.
so we sat there watching the movie… and everytime someone dies a terrible death, the whole theatre would go "oh!", "Ergh", "aww man!!!"…
so when we left the cinema, we were really thrilled, with the feeling that this is the best movie!! Yay…. :/
Movie Aftermath
Wow! this movie is cool! if only one of us had those intuitions… whao!
Me: (holding on to my temples and frowning) Hey! ur gonna die next! and then u and u and me… (in the order we were sitting in the theatre)

Final Destination 2
Me: Hey they’re showing FD 2. i watched the 1st one… it was cool! maybe we should watch it!
The person i was talking to: Oh, ok… cool. Let’s watch it.
I can’t rember who i watched it with, but i think it was with my Secondary school friends.
so we sat there watching the movie… and everytime someone dies a terrible death, the whole theatre would go "oh!", "Ergh", "aww man!!!"…
Movie Aftermath
Wow! this movie is cool! if only one of us had those intuitions… whao!
Me: (holding on to my temples and frowning) Hey! ur gonna die next! and then u and u and me… (in the order we were sitting in the theatre)

FD 3
Nad: Eh, we watch this movie after our paper togeder geder ok!
Me: oh okok, i watched the last 2 movies, it’s cool
Majee and CT: oh, okok.. sure
So, after the paper (which all of us finished before 6pm) we went to town; to watch the movie at lido. Bought the tix, walked around a little, ate and back to the cineplex at 9pm.

Ok, when i think of Lido… i think Big… BIG… Big theatre…. and the one we went into… was squishing me to death. i took the corner seat… and a hue pillar was so distracting! bloody hell

Then the movie started, with this eerie carnival scene; with an eerie music to go along with it. i hate carnival scenes with eerie musics. It makes me think of clowns.. the world’s worst imaginary creatures. But that’s wad the movie was about. eerie, gory and everything that ends with that "y" or "ie" sound.

so we sat there watching the movie… and everytime someone dies a terrible death, the whole (smurf) theatre would go "oh!", "Ergh", "aww man!!!"… and i would say "bloody hell!"

Yes, the movie was ok… the same kinda thing, fits the theme… people die the same way, heads squished, sliced, stabbed… blood on nearby people, some of them escaping death, overcoming the curse only for it to come back in a few months’ time. BUT!!!
Movie Aftermath
Me: (holding on to my temples and frowning) Hey! ur gonna die next! and then u and u and me… (in the order we were sitting in the theatre)

I still had to do that.. see it has alwasy been a different audience for my stupid act. i’ve always watched the movie with different people.
The sad thing is… that movie didn’t have different audience, and the theme is cool, it attracts people… but what’s played this time was exactly wad was played the other times; only different characters, different equipment.

To the producers of FD:
Please try changing the way pple die… at least by a lil bit. and also, add in people with accents… play with ur characters. Believe me, they won’t sue you.
You can probably kill someone by making a wolf attack them… making 1 turn psycho and kill another… then kill himself…
you know, pple getting killed by flying metal slates, and trcks and heavy objects falling on them.. is getting boring.

And there’s nothing wrong in adding some indian guy with that "waapenning waapenning" slang or an ugly asian girl into the film.
cute white guys, big black guys who dun believe white guys and end up being dead… B-O-R-I-N-G. the black Slang is not enough.

Of course peoe would flock to watch the movie, that’s what you want. but no one remembers it! everybody gets confused with all ur 3 sequels coz THEY ARE ALL THE SAME!
Whoever killed Creativity.

Now to those who are planning to watch this movie… U read my blog… that’s how the movie goes… you just got a whole movie in 1 post. so u still wanna spend a hefty 8-10bux on this movie.. .go ahead…

Rating: C+ (at least it’s a plus)